Today I wondered.
Why am I so set on him after all these years? What made it such an easy decision?
Well I could meet someone and he could learn to like me. And I could like him back. Maybe one day he could learn to love me but would I be able to love him back?
See, I already know this particular love, the love from him. I know how it makes me feel, I know what it feels like to lose it and now I know how it feels to get it back.
Then I also know the love I have for him. It’s a whole hearted love. So if I was to try to love another I would first have to take my heart from him one piece at a time, this could be a very long process, and quite frankly something I don’t know if I’m willing to do.
So we’re back at the love he gives me. It wouldn’t be fair for the person who may have just started liking me because once they said they loved me I’d expect nothing less than the love I feel now and that’s just too much pressure to put on someone. I don’t think anyone else is capable of loving me this way. He loves me just right. So he is my love, ever so perfect to me. Who else would it need to be perfect for other than I?
So that person who may have liked me may be able to love someone else just the same, just not me.
No no, I’m not asking you to understand.
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